Sunday, June 01, 2008

... And I'm Not Making This Stuff Up

At one point last week, a family member down in the Lower 48 looked at me solemnly and offered the following summation of my life:

"You live in an indie movie."

Which I chose to take as a compliment, conveniently ignoring all the really BAD ones featuring a bunch of needlessly morose spoiled middle class white people wearing black. Seriously, the only genre of film with a higher percentage of stinkers is lesbian cinema - which is a whole 'nother post. I'm talking about those cookie cutter Gen X films of a few years ago. You know, that crap foisted on us by Hollywood during the first Clinton administration, back when suddenly you could sell anything with an 'X' associated: Xtreme beverage, Xtreme skiing, etc.

Whoops, digressing.

All the above being merely an amusing way to introduce another list of weird shit oddities I've seen living here:
  • Do-it-yourself weatherization: entire buildings encased in a energy-saving cocoon of spray foam. (The foam then painted to lend the finished product a touch of class.)
  • A dumpster diver driving away from the transfer station in a Mercedes.
  • A big, wooden fish painted red. (Found in my yard, a space seemingly stuffed with odd items. ) Why did a previous tenant need a homemade wooden cutout of a fish? Why red? Note: I think it is a poorly done grayling.
  • Makeshift mass thawing device: Yesterday, I saw a friend 1.) remove a package of meat from the freezer, 2.) walk over to the hot tub, 3.) drop it in. Apparently, the hot tub does a really good job of thawing out frozen items and doesn't accidently cook them like the microwave does.

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