Thursday, July 27, 2006

Musings on a Personality Transplant...

I can't seem to let this one go. Moving past the utter bizarreness of that (in)famous Murk ad – what were his handlers thinking? I know that such a job has gotta be tough – I mean look at what Bush’s people must go through every time he twangs out of the side of his mouth – but really, can the job of Murk-marketing be so bad that they are totally addle-pated by it?

Or could it be that really they are Trekkies? Maybe what they are thinking is something along the lines of the Vulcan mind meld…hey – anything is worth a try when you are faced with having to tart up a candidate who has the distinction of having the worse rankings as governor in the nation (or could we, dare we say – “Next Four Years: the Worst Governor in All of Christendom”?). Now who would they be thinking of for a mind meld? Well, there is Jim Clark, Chief O’ Staff, who we all know is the puppet master anyway, but that is just trading one florid, overweight, overstuffed white guy for another – except that the puppet-master, like his national counter-part, is scarily and dangerously smart, and thus is the real culprit behind all the Murk shenanigans. There’s Brinkley the Dog, who as a mind meld candidate certainly would improve Charismatic Frank, but I wouldn’t wish that fate on anyone or any dog. Leave the Brink alone, he is doing just fine by his doggie self.

So, nope – can’t think of anyone who would be a good candidate for a personality transplant – er, mind meld – with Charismatic Frank. And besides, who in their right mind would donate theirs simply because Frank lacked one while he crazily steered this ship of state? Guess you’re stuck with your personality, Frank, and not just because we lack a Vulcan.

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